578: The Conjuring
Summary
Hosts Noah and Eli, joined by guests Thomas and Lydia, dissect the 2013 horror film The Conjuring, mocking its reliance on clichés like excessive doors and the Annabelle doll. The group heavily criticizes the real-life Warrens as fraudulent grifters and pokes fun at the movie’s illogical plot points, such as the Perron family’s refusal to leave the haunted house. They also joke about the film’s pacing and the absurdity of the "haunted" production trivia, concluding that the movie is a painful, slow-paced experience.
Topics discussed
Sponsor: McDonald's Monopoly
Introduction and guest Eli Bosnick
Banter on dehydration and ketamine
Nominating the movie for worst awards
Behind-the-scenes ghost stories and blood disease
Buying rights for demon reality show
The Perron family's mental health and bruises
Sponsor: Mint Mobile
Lydia's reaction and notes on jump scares
Copyright issues with the Raggedy Ann doll
The doll as a roommate and crayon drawings
Walking down the hall and the knock
The samurai armor demon and wardrobe
Classroom exposition and the doll's location
Bill Donahue's blog and the dog's reaction
The dog refusing to enter the haunted house
Hide and seek game in the new house
Exploring the basement with matches
Comically huge bruises on the daughter
Creepy piano notes and cobwebs
April's death and the dog's murder
The museum room and Ed Warren's shed
Painting of dogs playing poker
Deep dive into Conjuring lore and Wikipedia
Todd's wife and the glowing issue
The exorcist and the music box
Resolution with the daughter of the sleeper
Why the family doesn't leave the house
Hide and clap game and OSHA inspector
Halloween decorations and the spider jump scare
Joey King's performance and lighting
The ghost's desire to haunt again
Ed's store trip and Lorraine's clairvoyance
The creek in the basement and ghost ratio
The laziest demon clapping behind the wardrobe
Locking the demon in and the door smack
Mr. Theater and Scott Rubin shoutout
Dad returns to the chaos
The exorcism class and the video
Stages of possession and the fractal
Sleeping in the basement and the furnace
Ed and Lorraine's direction vs Perron's wishes
The number three and the clapping game
The scene that makes no sense
Glucktop and the clown link
The pilgrim and the stage manager ghost
Lorraine's assessment of the demons
Podcast deadline and iZotope RX
Salem witch trials and the grave
Time of death in 1849 and Rory
Ghost cameras and the cop
Drew and Snarky Daughter
The cop and the ghost trap
Beth Sheba's self-care and sex and the city
Breakfast and Lorraine's chores
The ruined creepy moment
Noticing the demon in the wife
The story of the mentally ill man
The jump scare and suicide
The ghost walking with her
Finding the noose in the hiding spot
The music box and the portly ghost lady
Cutting the ghost's finger
Lorraine's failure as a clairvoyant
Judy Warren and the possessed locket
Babysitting in a ghost house
The doll throwing the rock
Ed's plan and the finale location
The sheet thing and rolling around
The exorcist not being off book
The tourist exorcist and the bathroom
The bird and the hiding little girl
The demon dropping the girl
Remembering the family and sexism
The guy with the gun and the bite
The mirror and Annabelle's relevance
Show notes and next week's preview
Carolyn's divorce and glowing
Outro and credits
Listen ad-free on Castria