BREAKING NEWS: 312 Sports has learned how far away Hammond, Indiana is from Chicago
Summary
The hosts of Forward Progress satirically complete the Chicago Bears' new stadium fan survey, mocking its unscientific design and vague disclaimers. They critique absurd questions, such as asking if the distance to Hammond, Indiana, met expectations, and note the lack of actual stadium renderings. By creating a fake high-spending corporate persona, they unlock premium seating options to highlight the survey's focus on luxury sales rather than genuine fan feedback.
Topics discussed
Intro, ads, and decision to take the Bears stadium survey
Starting the survey and mocking the lack of stadium renderings
Ranting about the absurd 'distance to Hammond' question
Analyzing survey tactics and mocking the Bears' PR strategy
Completing the survey as a fake corporation with high budgets
Bears practice squad updates and Kyler Gordon workout video
NFL awards predictions and top 10 offense/defense rankings
Final survey submission, season opener promo, and outro
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